I'm off to Los Angeles this weekend, heading down with a friend to go check out the new Largo location. Jon Brion is playing, it should be pretty cool.
In any case, the LA trip brings me to another song about California, Tool's Aenima. From what I know, this song is based on part of a Bill Hicks routine about how he hates Los Angeles. Part of the song refers to Arizona Bay, which is what might be left if California fell into the ocean. Arizona Bay is also the title of an album by Bill Hicks.
The singer calls LA a "great big neon distraction" and warns listeners that they'd best "learn to swim", as he is hoping for the big one to hit. My favorite part is his rant about the Los Angeles inhabitants.
Fuck L Ron Hubbard and Fuck all his clones. Fuck all those gun-toting Hip gangster wannabes. Learn to swim. Fuck retro anything. Fuck your tattoos. Fuck all you junkies and Fuck your short memory. Learn to swim. Fuck smiley glad-hands With hidden agendas. Fuck these dysfunctional, Insecure actresses. Learn to swim. Cuz I'm praying for rain and I'm praying for tidal waves I wanna see the ground give way. I wanna watch it all go down. I don't know. I joke about hating LA quite a bit, but I really don't care in all honesty. I wouldn't want to see it obliterated like in the song, LA has its charms, and I suspect that Tool might be being a bit cheeky since they are still based there. It's still a great song, though, so check it out if you're unfamiliar with it.
So, I have to say, I hardly listen to (Tool's) Salival. Because of the odd shape of the packaging (much bigger than a CD jewel case or DVD snap case), it sits away from the storage racks, generally on top and somewhat forgotten. I had it ripped a long time ago, but I'd neglected to rip it again after the past several hard drive failures. I finally got around to ripping it last week and am enjoying it more than I ever have before, especially their cover of Led Zeppelin's No Quarter. I haven't heard it in forever, but I kinda want to put on the Zep version just to compare, because I have a feeling that Tool's version will blow away the Zep version...only in that I love Tool, and merely liked Led Zeppelin.
I can respect Led Zeppelin for what they've done, but they've sorta become a caricature to me. It's so hard to listen to them without remembering some crappy ass FM station championing Stairway to Heaven (or some other overplayed Zep track) two or three times a day ("This is KRQR and *that* was the mighty Led Zeppelin with their classic, Black Dog"). HELLO STFU PLZ IM TIRED OF HEARING THIS KTHXBYE. Or how about the fucking stoners in high school, with their steeltoe boots, dirty blue jeans and their denim jackets that had the giant-sized Swan Song patch logo sewn onto the back, along with the Zoso logo scribbled onto their schoolbooks and binders while walking around muttering, "Zeppelin, dude." under their breath and flashing each other with the \m/ sign. UMM HELLO STFU PLZ KTHXBYE.
Man, I wish I could go back in time to utter that phrase to those assholes. I'd be dressed smartly in black and I'd totally walk up to them and start with, "Hello (random stoner dude), I have a message for you from the future. STFU PLZ KTHXBYE." They would stare at me blankly, not getting it, as I walked away and disappeared...but it would make ME feel better.
And that, my friends, is my expert analysis on why Tool's No Quarter > Led Zeppelin's No Quarter. Compare and contrast. KTHXBYE.
I'm off to Los Angeles this weekend, heading down with a friend to go check out the new Largo location. Jon Brion is playing, it should be pretty cool.
